Lama tak update cite kan kan kan? Sebab, takde benda menarik nak cerita. Hari ni dah 27 tahun 2 minggu usia saya dan dah 3 bulan 10 hari jadi penganggur saya ni. Punya lah STRESS! Duit makin susut, stress ler. Tapi plan bercuti-cuti tak habeh lagi. Hee.. BTW, sepanjang sebulan saya bermusafir (baru je balik dari Negeri Sembilan and Kedah Darul Aman), saya banyak ber'mingle-mingle' (jahanam bahasa) dengan golongan-golongan lanjut usia. My granny, pak long, mak long and mak kepada kakak angkat den.
Bergaul dengan diaorang ni banyak menyumbang senyuman ke wajah saya. Geli hati mendengar mereka berkeluh kesah tentang batang tubuh mereka, ingat-ingat lupa mereka, saya tak dapat menahan bibir dari mengukir senyuman dan berkata "dah tua". Heh macam mana kita bila dah tua nanti? Macam tu ler. Melayan orang-orang tua ni kena banyak sabar dan WAJIB ikhlas. Dengar saja rungutan mereka dan senyum manis tanpa hentinya. Rahsia saya menjadi kesayangan mereka. Wink!
But sometimes, seriously I just want to be silent but their nosy nose just can't be helped. Take example my pak long, again and again he asked, "hang habaq mai kat aku pasai apa yang hang duk menung ja ni?". How sweet? I still feel the sincerity but when they keep engaging me in conversations or dragging me socializing with village folks, I can't help to feel suffocate and their persistent make me irritated. Been in a big CONSERVATIVE family, privacy is something out of reach for most of the times. Ungrateful fella. Hee..but yahh, they're all I have. Nothing more. Nothing less. I love them. No doubt.
Saya bermusafir pulang ke kampung halaman tok nenek saya dikala takde sesapa pun pulang bercuti hanya kerana mahu bertenang kononnya. See am getting OLD and feel nothing. That my problem is. My journey didn't help me find anything, any answer or any question am looking for (really clueless, helpless, hopeless) but help me buying some time to be alone. I like the feeling to be alone during those bus riding. Alone at the terminal. Alone walking down the road. Alone at my favourite 'port' behind my mak long's house. I'm getting used and getting love the idea to be ALONE I see.
Anyway, next week and next month I won't be alone during my journey anymore. Got some company. Some other loser..;P. But this time I'll go cross over the sea. Orang kata, jauh perjalanan luas permandangan. I hope so. Wish me luck for finding my free soul. Wandering off for sooooo long. Need to back home. =D
"Heh..sy akn rindu buai tcabut blkg umah mak long ni..tmpt feveret sy bsantai smbl tgk mak long msk..kna dengki ngn pak long..tgk ayam itik kejar mkn..biawak yg duk pnjat pokok kelapa..smlm jmp cacing tnh BESAR..gle jakun lama xtgk..hee..angin sepoi2 gegar daun2 pokok ni..blkg umah tok de sungai n bendang..seee blk cni br rasa blk kg..hee"
My fb status for yesterday
